Another myrtle has come and gone, and while I nibble on antacids and procrastinate clearing out my work inbox, I thought it would be nice to reflect upon the good times, and revisit our pre-Myrtle prognostications.
Highlights from the trip:
- A Myrtle rookie makes his mark early by taking the RV club one step further with the RV bomb (a car bomb that's taken while traveling at 60 mph). His high praise was short lived however, as he lasted until just past Richmond before passing out....in the middle of a card game.
- Another year, another order of waffle house hash browns topped (cheese) and covered (chili)....and another year of not breaking the RV code. I'm living dangerously, but surviving none the less (t'was an RV rookie who broke the code this year).
- Myrtle euphoria + cute Hooters gift shop chick + beer every 15 miles from Ensfield NC to Myrtle Beach SC = Hooters golf towels for all!!!
- I don't care what they say, Moden's hat was fly. They all just hatin', kid.
- Sheabone was in the group behind me on first round in the first day. On just about every other hole I heard "HEY PIERRE!" This was followed by the very large man humping whatever was close.
- Sheabone was in my group on the second round in the first day. When he rolled up, I sighed deeply knowing my round was in trouble. Beer club was performed on the second hole.
- Glen Dornouch, hole 16.....shirtless par 3. Followed very shortly by the shirtless beer club (another Myrtle first)
- Hurricane Mikoy cut a path of destruction 4 condos deep. 6 shot guns and 2 car bombs in an hour. When opened the door he just stood there grinning. "Sheabone is hiding from me," he said in a French accent. That should have been enough warning right there.
- Carmela Soprano owes me a quesadilla
- A certain hero deserves a medal for saving the day not once by twice. Not only did he carry 3 drunken fool out of a "gentleman's establishment" (thereby saving their bank accounts) but he also made a timely call informing us of traffic on I-95. This saved another fool from messing his shorts in the RV (we'd already dumped the septic at this point). Well done, sir, and thank you!
- Moden aka Superfly Snuka may interrupt your dinner
- Pool party with the crazy fish and white lightning....and Shrek's ass!
- "Ohhhh Noooooowh" is the new "Fail." Said just as often in 2010, and every bit as annoying and addicting.
- Prestwick can suck it
- OhShea OhSheaOhShea OhShea!!!!
- Myrtle 2010 was capped off with a "fail" 30 second before departure as I dropped our condo key down the drainage grate in the parking lot. Thankfully the condo wasn't on my credit card (sorry Dave).
- ...and finally, a sincere thank you to Brett for organizing another great time. It's a #$&@-ton of work but it turns our amazing every time.
"That's a terrible recap...just tell us who won already!" Fine....you impatient jerk...here you go. Below you'll find the finishes for all 16 golfers as well as a comparison to our intial projections. Some we nailed pretty close, others way way off. Congratulations to Brett for taking the trophy! He played solid golf all week, and still manged to hammer down beer clubs.
1st Place: Brett Mikoy (pre-Myrtle Projecton: 2nd)
What we said: "He won't miss by much, but the round 3 pairing (Shea, Bos, Lich) might be too much to overcome.
Net (over par): -1
Recap: It turns out he lived through his 3rd round pairing just fine, posting an 80 gross while firing down multiple beer clubs. Probably the most well rounded tournament anyone has played in the LBI - 3 rounds in the low 80s and one in the 70's, with lots and lots of pound towns. Impressive.
2nd Place: Matt Moden (pre-Myrtle Projecton: 9th)
What we said: "2-time champ won't muster the magic from prior years."
Net (over par): +7
Recap: Moden shrugged off fire ant attacks and drunken injuries and wound up playing some solid golf. Though he struggled in the 4th round, Moden still managed to hang on to 2nd place thanks to strong rounds at Glen Heather and Grande Dunes.
3rd Place: Matt Sapsford (pre-Myrtle Projecton: 5th)
What we said: "He will get his mental game under control and solidify his legacy in the LBI...but if there is a blow up it will come in round one (paired with Ladd & Nasar)"
Net (over par): +11
Recap: We weren't the only ones to think the first round could spell doom for 2010. Ladd & Nasar had a side bet as to which hole I'd blow up on during that first round. Despite their attempts to break me, I kept my mental game in check and played well. Unfortunately the heat and the shot guns were a little too much for me at Glen Dornouch where I posted my only triple digit round (100). I made a charge at Moden in the last round, but the hangover effect from Hurricane Mikoy proved a little to difficult to overcome.
4th Place: Jason Lich (pre-Myrtle Projecton: 1st)
What we said: "If he remembers how to score, he could be dragging the trophy 3000 miles across the country"
Net (over par): +21
Recap: After a mediocre 1st day (89, 97 - including a 10 on the super tough 18th at Glen Dornouch), Lich made a hard charge on the 3rd round at Grande Dunes posting an 85. Unfortunately the poor conditions of the greens at Prestwick got the better of him, and he couldn't continue his charge. Still, a hard fought top 5 finish.
5th Place (tied): Brian Ladd (pre-Myrtle Projecton: 8th)
What we said: "Can he keep it together and post strong, or will he focus on the liquid side of the game...he should finish near the middle of the pack and make a good mark as a rookie."
Net (over par): +25
Recap: Ladd made a strong impact in his first year in the LBI, entering the final round net +13. Unfortunately the liquid side got the better of him as he fought through the hangover on the last round and nearly doubled his net score. Perhaps most importantly (or most tragically - depending on how you look at it) he was able to capture the shirtless par 3 on film.
5th Place (tied): Chris Mikoy (pre-Myrtle Projecton: 4th)
What we said: "CT's been playing solid golf lately, but with limited time for practice, he may finish 3rd among the Mikoy's"
Net (over par): +25
Recap: After fighting through the pound town round at Glen Dornouch and posting a solid 85, things looked good for CT. But then came the rage -- not at his golf game, but rather the poor conditions at Prestwick (the greens really were terrible). Regardless whether it was the rage or the conditions, CT's 95 in the final round took him out of contention for a top 3 finish.
5th Place (tied): Steve Boswell (pre-Myrtle Projecton: 6th)
What we said: "Bos is playing with an average group handicap of 17.8, which should keep him focused enough to avoid the catastrophe round"
Net (over par): +25
Recap: El Jesus Boswellio did not have the catastrophe round which seems to plague his golf game, but nor did he have that low round which propelled him to the 2009 championship. His 4 rounds were all about 4 or 5 strokes over par... respectable and consistent, but not enough for a top 3 finish.
8th Place: Kevin Shea (pre-Myrtle Projecton: 7th)
What we said: "Too many beer clubs"
Net (over par): +27
Recap: We almost completely missed our projection on Shea. Rolling into the final day at +7, Shea was in the hunt for 2nd place. Another victim of Hurricane Mikoy, Shea struggled mightily at Prestwick posting a crushing 113. Let it be known Shea did not limp to the finish line! After fighting through the front nine, Shea beer clubed the final 4 holes.
9th Place: Brian Ciarlo (pre-Myrtle Projecton: 3rd)
What we said: "His game is strong enough to win, but playing the whole week with high handicappers is just an uphill battle"
Net (over par): +32
Recap: Despite our concerns over his pairings, we still thought Ciarlo could pull off a top 3 finish. We were wrong. Ciarlo dug himself into a hole with a +18 net after day one and, despite playing well at Grande Dunes, succumbed to the beer clubs at Prestwick.
10th Place: Rufus Knight (pre-Myrtle Projecton: 13th)
What we said: "Rufus is cash money inside 75 yards...the problem is getting there"
Net (over par): +34
Recap: Wearing pants for only half the rounds, Rufus looked as though he was going to prove the prognosticators wrong. He posted the 2nd best net score at Glen Dornouch, and entered the final round at a net +16. Unfortunately he posted his worst score on the final round with a net +18. We'll once again throw the blame on Prestwick. Boooo Prestwick....Booo. Mow your greens!!!
11th Place: Bryan Mikoy (pre-Myrtle Projecton: 10th)
What we said: "The handicap is too low...posting a 70's round just get a net par is too much to ask"
Net (over par): +37
Recap: Perhaps it was the back to back rounds in the 90s that set off Hurricane Mikoy. His pain was our pain as he took down about half of the golfers in the field.
12th Place: Troy Welck (pre-Myrtle Projecton: 14th)
What we said: "With the new kid and not much practice, Troy will focus on what he needs to, boozing....maybe even sleeping"
Net (over par): +43
Recap: Turns out what he needed to focus on was the World Cup, as Troy posted his best round on the final day -- when he had a portable TV in the cart showing the world cup game.
13th Place: Dave Nasar (pre-Myrtle Projecton: 15th)
What we said: "Dave's mustache makes him look like Freddy Mercury"
Net (over par): +49
Recap: No one at Myrtle 2010 grew a mustache except me. Despite the fact Dave could have grown a mustache during the RV ride down the Myrtle he decided not to impersonate the former front man for Queen. Booo. Bad Form! Dave battled a bulging disc in his back for the entire week and actually played well for stretches, but not enough for a top 10 finish.
14th Place: Chris Stevens (pre-Myrtle Projecton: 11th)
What we said: "His 1st round pairing should get him off to a solid start"
Net (over par): +58
Recap: His 1st round pairing did indeed get him off to a solid start -- unfortunately it went downhill from there. White Lightning battled through some heat exhaustion at Glen Dornouch and fortunately he was able to recover and finish out the week.
15th Place: Doug Barszcz (pre-Myrtle Projecton: 12th)
What we said: "Never underestimate such a high handicap"
Net (over par): DNF
Recap: Barszcz was off to a solid week before a family emergency required he leave in the middle of the final round. Our thoughts and prayers are with him and his family.
16th Place: Mike Hollandsworth (pre-Myrtle Projecton: 16th)
What we said: "He has an excellent chance to shoot 8 rounds of par golf....unfortunately it will be over 4 rounds"
Net (over par): DNF
Recap: Even before the effects of Hurricane Mikoy caused him to withdraw after 6 holes on the final round, Mike was on a one way train to last place. As a result, he had to clean out the RV shitter, which thanks to a fellow rookie contained an ugly little surprise.
So there you have it. Another Myrtle come and gone, we are left waiting another year until we can run around like morons, play golf with our shirts off, and shot gun beers on the tee box.
Financial recap and possibly more videos to follow. For those interested, my photos can be seen here (nothing scandalous).
~Saps
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